Transformation of Martin: From Struggle to Strength with Testosterone Therapy

May 07, 2024

En a few years ago, at age 27, Maarten began an unforgettable journey that would radically change his life. He struggled with a series of symptoms that affected his daily life: a lack of motivation, obesity, and a future outlook that was far from reality. Despite countless visits to doctors and specialists, who often pointed Martin's symptoms to depression, he found no relief in the antidepressants prescribed.

The turning point in March's life came when, at the urging of someone at the gym, he decided to have his testosterone level tested via Blood Value Test. The results were a revelation: his testosterone was significantly lower than it should be, which explained many of his symptoms. Armed with this knowledge, he began a treatment regimen that would change his life.

After initial reluctance from his family doctor, Maarten did get a referral to a specialist. Together they decided on testosterone treatment, which was not without its challenges. Gradually, Maarten began to notice a difference. He became more active, more confident, and finally began to see a future for himself worth pursuing.

This story by Martin is not only a testimony of his personal struggle and victory, but also a call to awareness. It emphasizes the importance of understanding our own bodies and not ignoring symptoms that indicate a deeper problem. It shows that sometimes solutions are not obvious and that perseverance is needed to fight for the quality of life everyone deserves. Now Martin is ready to tell his own story.

The start of this process is more than 2 years ago. I had been struggling with weird symptoms for a long time for which I regularly went to doctors, including specialists such as psychologists and psychiatrists. I would describe myself as unmotivated, lazy, dejected, gloomy, irritable, and got fat very easily. A few years before the start of this whole story, I weighed close to 130 kilograms at a height of 1.74m. After a good year of vigorous dieting, horrific weight loss, and all sorts of weird eating patterns (vegan, one meal a day, keto, etc.) I had managed to get my weight down to 75 kilograms. During this time, I also discovered a love for sports; I regularly did cycling and running, but I especially loved doing strength training. Mentally I liked this, but it also helped for physical development and so that my neck, shoulders, and back hurt less while performing a sedentary job. But certain things unfortunately still stuck with me... I was very much stuck with the fact that I really had no plans for the future, no hobbies, no passion, and no drive in them at all. I also constantly asked myself, "What good is this life anyway?" I regularly talked about this with specialists. These specialists often drew the conclusion that it was depression. Through the years I was frequently put on antidepressants, with all the consequences of that: getting even fatter and becoming emotionally flat (unpleasant things are experienced as moderate, but also pleasure I hardly experienced). But the problem actually remained the same all that time; it didn't really make me happy or joyful.

One day at the gym, a guy came up to me and said, "Dude, with how hard you've been training here for 1.5 years, your progress is really bad. Shouldn't you even have your testosterone pricked?" I felt a little insulted, of course, but wanted to look into this. I started searching online, registered on a bodybuilding forum to get more information, discussed what my roommate thought about this with me, and finally had a testosterone test done via bloodtesting.nl. The result came in at 7.9 nmol/L, while the reference value is 8.64 - 29.00. My roommate was not really surprised at this result. I immediately made an appointment with the family doctor to discuss my findings with her. Unfortunately, my GP appeared to have little knowledge of hormones and was not really eager to refer me either.

Then studied myself some more, changed certain things in my diet, as I was obviously coming out of a phase where I had eaten very little because I had lost over 50kg in 1 year. So I decided to wait another 3 months, start eating considerably more (3000 kcal per day) so I could get a more honest result. Another shot... 7.0 nmol/L. Huh? It got even lower; I didn't understand it at all. By this time, it was also clear to me that only total testosterone doesn't advance and that more values are important, such as free testosterone, SHBG, LH, FSH, Estradiol. I had all that tested via a post-dose test. LH and FSH, the control hormones of testosterone, were all at or below the reference value. Free testosterone was low. I went to the doctor again; this time he was willing to give me a referral to the urologist.

With the blood tests from blood value test finally went to the urologist for consultation. Reviewed the blood values with him. Of course, he wanted to take some additional tests himself. Based on those results, the doctor decided that I would qualify for testosterone treatment. Normally this treatment starts with taking medication such as Clomiphene, but because I have something hereditary with my liver, which causes medication not to break down properly, he didn't think this was such a tight plan. After consulting with the urologist, I decided to go for Sustanon, 1 injection of 1 ml every 2 weeks. I discussed fertility issues, but since I absolutely do not want children, I did not do anything with this. A good acquaintance of mine did have some sperm frozen for these purposes just to be safe, since testosterone medication doesn't seem to be great for your desire to have children.

The progression. On Day 1, I created a file on the PC where I would keep track of everything around developments during the first year. I also made the agreement to sit down with my roommate regularly to discuss what she was experiencing and if there were not things happening in me that she really didn't like, since judging your own behavior/changes is not necessarily easy.

Prior Complaints: Fatigue, gloomy, poor libido, no beard growth, unmotivated, explosive temper, getting fat easily.

After 4 weeks, I noticed that I started to become a little more assertive. I had quite an urge to have myself pushed aside (literally and figuratively), and I began to notice that I was increasingly not letting that happen anymore. I often found this to be a nice development, but it also sometimes shot through to becoming really fierce/angry/aggressive, especially people I found really anti-social, I reacted very strongly to. The first months I really had to consciously tell myself to avoid conflicts, as I noticed that I reacted very differently to many situations than before. I certainly don't have a conflict-avoiding personality of my own, and the testosterone did make that much more apparent. I used to suffer a lot from acne; this unfortunately did play up again.

After 3 months of testosterone, it was time for another blood test. This came back at 26.4 (reference 8.64-29.00). By this time I thought it was getting nice; my spirits were improving, my motivation to tackle things and learn was increasing, the beard was starting to grow, the fatigue was subsiding. I also noticed that the solicitation and approach of women really increased substantially. I met someone during my search who has been on testosterone treatment himself for over 1.5 years. He confirmed this phenomenon and even found a girlfriend shortly after starting it. We both concluded that a huge testosterone deficiency does not seem to help your chances of finding a woman (somewhere evolutionarily logical). Certain habits/addictions I had I also kicked out the door much easier, things like smoking and unhealthy eating patterns. Suddenly there was the "backbone" to clear debris in my life. Even though the balance in myself was way off. During this period, I still had to be very careful with conflict situations and found myself really overexcited. Also, my attitude tended to be "cocky" on a regular basis. The gym progression was really overwhelming for me then. The muscle mass increased, the strength increased; of course this was not my primary goal of this treatment, but what a fun workout this period was.

5 months of prodding, during this time my spirits thankfully finally stabilized. The aggression/excitement decreased drastically. During this period I struggled a lot with the question, "Why did I never notice this before? Comparing myself to peers, it was pretty obvious". My roommate also began to find me a much nicer roommate by this time. My acne remained quite present, and during this time I took Isotretinoin for 2 months against the acne. This drug also relieved my acne before and did so again this time.

After 9 months on the testosterone, the first sentence I read in my file was, "Man, what a lot has changed. My stress management was good for the first time in my life; I was calmer, much more controlled, and people around me also increasingly said that I had changed, in the positive sense. I was beginning to make sense of life for the first time. I was planning for the future, figuring out where my passion lies, learning new things, maintaining a stable job, exercising nicely, eating decently. The emotional outbursts were thankfully almost gone; no more hope anger and dejection. Family ties that had deteriorated gave attention and improved. During this period I often noticed that I was doing things differently than I am used to from myself. The first year was really about rediscovering myself. Hormones do an enormous amount to your body, mind and way of doing things. It's not that my character and personality have changed, but I have become much more moderate, understanding, patient, and motivated.

Now, almost 2 years on, and my family, roommate, surroundings and I still think it's the best thing I've discovered in years. That one tip from that huge guy at the gym has improved my life so tremendously. From an uninspiring, obese, nihilistic, dejected, fired up, perspective-less, negative male who was constantly changing jobs, to a stable guy who has life goals. Now I am constantly chasing challenges physically and mentally. I work many hours a week and enjoy doing it too. I even honestly admit that for the first time in my life I regularly think, "This life is actually really nice and definitely has potential to make something of. For now I'm still on 1ml of Sustanon every 2 weeks, but in consultation with the doctor I have agreed to divide this over 2 injections of 0.25ml per week for more stable blood values.

To conclude, I had listed some advantages/disadvantages.

Advantages:

More drive/motivation to make something of it
Less gloomy and dejected
Emotionally more stable (after the initial phase)
Physical developments
Better equipped
Body's own substance, so few side effects and organ burden
Future Prospect
Beard can grow
More combative, assertive and more of a 'go getter'
Confident
Libido
Acne/skin is better now than it has ever been
Relationship opportunities increase sharply
Very cheap form of medication at your own risk

Disadvantages:

Post injection pain, the muscle in which you puncture will still be stiff and/or sore for a few days
I don't find the pricking itself a particularly pleasurable activity
I really found the initial aggression increase a problem
Hunger increased significantly, but fortunately did not put on huge amounts of fat as a result
Acne, acne is often hormone related, which is why you often encounter it during puberty. Testosterone treatments definitely increased this
Certain traits of yourself change and you will really have to rediscover them.
It takes a long time before all the desired results appear, in my opinion testosterone replacement therapy takes about 1 year before you see and notice all the results. Especially the mental results take longer
Never actually gets rid of it
Potential for fertility problems

I hope I can help someone facing the same problems by writing this blog.

Written by roommate: He was dejected, unmotivated, saw no meaning in life, had emotional outbursts, was very overweight, and we could go on and on. He then came across testosterone via a forum, and upon reading about the symptoms of low levels of this, he scored so characteristically in almost all areas that it was actually clear to us before testing that he had to look in this area. Adjusting the testosterone levels was still quite a quest, and in the beginning he needed a lot of attention to keep his fuse under control. Once this was up and running, we both noticed significant differences in many different areas. He became more self-assured, optimistic, motivated for life, curious about possibilities, more active, more assertive, and started to search constructively for meaning and everyday fulfillment that gives him satisfaction. Physically, a lot changed for him as well. Losing weight became much better and easier. Movement and muscle production became so different that it became fun for him to work on; curiosity about what was possible in that area. As a result, his endurance and fitness increased significantly, and his blood pressure decreased. He developed facial hair for the first time, because before the testosterone he had virtually none.